I woke up with my husbands arms wrapped tightly around me, before I even opened my eyes I said a quick prayer thanking God for handpicking such a man for me. In my husbands arms I felt warm, content, protected, and at peace. Soaking in the moment I thanked God for the overwhelming amount of blessings He has given me.
My stomach growled loudly, and before I was truly ready, it was time to break away from my husbands embrace. We decided to grab breakfast at our local diner. Getting ready I quickly became aware of all the task on my to-do list. I needed to take my girls to the pumpkin farm and spend quality time with them. I needed to clean our master bedroom and bathroom. I needed to do the laundry. I needed to go to the grocery store, which also meant I needed to plan meals and coupon. I needed to make sure my husband got a hair cut. I needed to eat, I was starving! I needed to finish two days worth of Bible study, before our group meeting the next day. I needed to work on my blog. I needed to run, I hadn’t found time for that in three days.
I just wanted time to enjoy my Saturday.
The most logic next step was to give the to-do list to God. Pray over my schedule and my day. Let go, and let God. So I did. I sat down on our bed crisscross applesauce and breathed deeply. I prayed “God, I need you to make time in my day to get all this done. I need your help, otherwise it’s going to be a mess. I love you, and I’m so thankful for this day you’ve blessed me with. Amen.”
But then everything became a struggle!
I love our little small town diner, but it took forever to get breakfast. Thinking I could keep moving through tasks while waiting, I tried to download coupons on my Kroger app, but it kept loading and re-loading, making it very difficult to accomplish anything productive. I did enjoy every bite of my biscuits and chocolate gravy once it arrived, and three cups of coffee. By the time we left the diner rain clouds had moved in and the wind had picked up. The pumpkin patch wasn’t happening.
Since the pumpkin patch would have to be rescheduled, I decided the next task would be my husband’s hair cut. As he headed that way, my daughters and I walked down Main Street to the antique store. To my dismay he quickly joined us when there were no available openings for over an hour.
My frustration only grew. Another task that did not go the way I wanted.
On to the next task. At the grocery store I became focused. Get food for the week, don’t forget anything, and stay on budget. When my husband stopped to chit-chat with co-workers for a few minutes, I became very annoyed by his lack of focus, and continued on without hesitation to complete the tasks at hand. I had no time to dilly dally, I wanted to get everything checked off my list, then hopefully I would have a little time left to enjoy my day. At home as we unloaded groceries I could feel fatigue overwhelming my body and my anxiety climbing uncontrollably as the hours steadily ticked by. When my husband pointed out that I had forgotten the cream cheese for the dessert I had planned to make, I felt irritated and snapped at him. He was there too, he could have remembered.
I looked around and felt the weight of the world on my shoulders.
Our home was in way worse despair than I had originally took in that morning. I snapped at my girls to pick up their messes. I snapped at my husband again, just because he was present and in the line of fire. Frustrated and feeling defeated I simply sat down on our bed, face in my hands and started to cry. What went wrong? Why had I ended up here? I gave my day to God. I asked Him for help. I needed to accomplish my list and crying wasn’t on it. In that moment I realized that God had been there all along, He however wasn’t impressed with my list of things to-do, because the most important need of all was completely absent. I felt God telling me I had missed the point…
This is my Command: Love each other
John 15:17
I am a task oriented person. Not a relationship oriented person.
Because of this I often completely miss the opportunities given to me to live out John 15:17. I miss opportunities to let His light shine through me. I didn’t focus on the time I was given with my family, nor did I tune into the surroundings around me. I should have taken opportunities to share love and nurture relationships, the most important tasks of all.
I could have spent a joyful breakfast with my husband and daughters. I only get this opportunity once a week. I could have leaned into them, engaged in conversation, and played a silly I Spy game, but instead I CHOSE to multitask my way through it. I could have spent an hour antiquing with my daughters while waiting patiently for my husband to get his hair cut. My oldest daughter would have loved this and it would have made her day, but instead I CHOSE to move on to the next task.
I could have spared five minutes to really engage with my husband’s co-workers. Letting His light shine through me by being respectful, taking the time to listen to them, and to care about the relationships present. Instead I CHOSE to continue with the tasks and disregard the people.
At home I looked around at socks and shoes laying abandoned, puzzle pieces on the coffee table, baby dolls discarded in random places, crayons and Lego’s laying on the floor, jackets tossed carelessly over chairs, and numerous other odds and ends out-of-place. I became annoyed and frustrated as I CHOSE to add up one task after another that I felt needed to be completed.
I should have stopped. I should have returned right then to prayer. I should have realized long before the snapping and tears that this was not what God had in mind for me or my family, this was a creation purely my own.
I should have seen my daughters toys scattered around as a sign of her happiness. I should have looked at those baby dolls and seen the way she loved them. I should have felt an over powering sense of love for my children and thankfulness for them. I should not of felt frustration and anxiety. I should not have become a snappy crabby mama, but instead realized that this season will soon pass. Sooner than I want, she will grow out of this stage, as her big sister already has. I should have stopped and absorbed God’s blessings and His love for me. I am blessed to have a home to clean, I am blessed to have children to care for, I am blessed to have a husband that never forgets to nurture relationships over tasks.
I promised you honesty and transparency. Here it is. I woke up thankful and blessed by God’s presence in my life, I sought Him out, and I asked for His help. Yet when it came down to it, and I went to live out my day, I disregarded Jesus’s command to love each other. His command was not on my list of things to do.
I allowed my list of task to take over my day.
My mind-set of get it done took over, and because I was only focused on my needs, and no one else’s I fell flat on my face, I failed. Some of my tasks did get checked off, but when I looked back at my day I was saddened by the missed opportunities. I was saddened by the wasted time. I was saddened by my lack of love.
I should have remembered to live out John 15:17. Relationships with people should always out weigh the task at hand.
I’m writing this because hopefully my darling friend if you are anything like me, it will inspire and encourage you to STOP, and think the next time you are creating your to-do list.
There are two tasks that should trump all others, and these are to love God and love people.
Our Father loves people. He loves you and He loves me. He always has time to love us and nurture our relationship with Him. The tasks we have are probably directly related to the blessings He has given us. We must remember to love and be thankful, and then God will take care of the rest.
After drying my tears, and realizing my errors, I worked hard to recover the day. I spent undistracted time with my husband, leaned into him and just loved on him. I made a dessert with my youngest, because she loves to bake. I purposely let her control the situation. I let her make a mess, and while I watched her smile and giggle and steal small licks off the spoon, I felt my heart fill with love. Yes, it would have been faster and less messy to just do it myself and get it over with, but I refused to miss another opportunity to love on her. We enjoyed dinner and played UNO as a family, teasing one another back and forth, and engaging in conversations that may not have taken place otherwise.
I still had time to clean, I still had time to work on my blog, and check a few more tasks off my list. However, I also purposely took the opportunities presented to enjoy life, give love to my family, and in return receive it right back. As a task oriented person and an introvert it is hard for me to focus on loving people and growing relationships. The struggle is real, and I thank God for showing me through my tears of frustration that I was missing the point. There will ALWAYS be another task to complete, but there may not always be the chance to love, there may not be another chance to engage and connect with the people around you. Don’t miss the opportunities to live out John 15:17 in your life, in doing so you are letting His light shine.
Are you a task or people oriented person?
Do you often seize the opportunities God gives you to love people?
Are you letting His light shine through you? Or are you just moving from one task to another focused on your own list of things to do?
Do you know someone who would be encouraged by this Blog Post? Please share! By doing so you are helping spread His Light to others 🙂
I would LOVE to connect with you! Like and follow along on Facebook, Instagram, and Pinterest.
If you found this Blog Post encouraging and would like to subscribe to E-Mail notifications for future post please do so!
As always your thoughts and comments are welcome!! Connecting is so important in forming Godly relationships!
