Progress is directly linked to happiness. People moving in a forward direction in life are happier than those that feel stuck in a repeating pattern of life. Having goals and meeting them leads to a feeling of accomplishment, and ultimately happiness! It is important to have goals in life, because otherwise it is hard to determine if you are making progress.

Am I making progress?

In the past year my life has been moving in different directions very quickly. I’ve been stepping forward over and over again, but without clear direction. I’ve found myself exhausted, stressed, confused, and ultimately over the past few weeks lost.

 I wondered if I was making progress? In the process of asking myself this question, I suddenly realized that I didn’t have clear-cut goals.

Sitting with a cup of strong black coffee, crisscross apple sauce on my pink yoga mat, with a note pad, my favorite pen, and my Bible beside me, I met with God. I simply began to pour my heart out.

God what is it that I’m supposed to be focusing on?

What is the direction you have for me?

What are my next steps forward?

What glorifies you the most in my life?

What are the most important things in my life?

I wrote down these five things:

God

 Husband

Children

Spreading Light

Health

# 1: KNOW YOUR WHAT

You can’t make clear-cut goals without knowing what is most important in your life.

Just sitting down and refocusing on what was most important to me gave me some clarity. I know this sounds incredibly simple. Very basic. I also know that some of you live lives similar to mine. You’re up at the crack of dawn, and you’re consistently on the go until you lay back down at night. Moving from one task to another as quickly as possible, checking off that to-do list, and trying to do it gracefully. I see you. Hair in a messy bun, getting life done. Day after day. You are so busy moving in every direction possible that you’ve not had time to stop and think, am I making progress? Is this the life I want to live? You have to know your WHAT. What is most important to YOU in YOUR life?

#2: MAKE YOUR GOALS

I promised you open and  honest transparency in my writing, so here are mine!

Goal One: Lead a God first life. Placing Him front and center, and glorifying Him in all things. (I like big goals 🙂 )

Goal Two: Have an amazing marriage, by loving and serving my husband the way he deserves.

Goal Three:  Be a good mom.

Goal Four: Spread light, this ties very closely into goal number one, but is very different for me. Why? Because I can not allow my writing/blog, serving, or church positions to ever become more important than my marriage and my girls.

Goal Five: Take time to focus on me and my health.

#3: APPLY EFFORT IN THE RIGHT DIRECTION

Now that I have established my goals, I can re-focus my effort. Then move in the right direction, taking my next steps forward, and accomplishing my goals. This equals progress within my life and ultimately happiness.

Effort in the right direction is so important. If you just apply effort randomly, to a million different things a day, you may never see real progress. Don’t waste your effort. Break down your goals into smaller goals that can be achieved daily, weekly, and/or monthly. And stay focused.

For example, my goal number one can be broken down into daily goals of spending time in God’s word, prayer, and worship every morning. I need to ask myself every time I make a decision, if it truly glorifies Him and aligns with His purpose for my life. It will take effort in the right direction, but by practicing spiritual disciplines within my life, such as reading His word, praying, fasting, worshiping, serving, solitude, and discernment, I can easily keep God front and center!

Goal two can be broken down into fun things like date nights once or twice a month! Goal number two also means I have to be intentional about establishing good daily goals. I have to remember that my husband isn’t someone I can take advantage of, but someone I should treat as the most important person in my life. I have to work on building him up and supporting him fully. I have to be intentional about communicating in a healthy way, and showing him love 🙂 even when he’s getting on my nerves (this is real life, I love him, but he is not perfect and neither am I. Therefore we can annoy the crap out of each other sometimes). Goal number two means I need to set small goals of evaluating and nourishing my marriage on a regular basis. Never taking it for granted. I will need to be intentional about bringing my husband and my marriage before God in prayer. It will again take a lot of effort in the right direction, but to me all of this effort leads to progress towards a happy life.

Goal three, takes a great deal of effort in the right direction too. KIDS take a great deal of EFFORT! If I’m not focused in my effort and direction things become unbalanced. I want to make sure that I am encouraging my daughters on a daily basis, taking quality time to engage with them, and making sure that I am aware of what is going on in their lives. I want to have fun with them!! This most recently included riding water slides, going for bikes rides, jumping on the trampoline, and catching fire flies. I want to teach them responsibility and basic homemaking skills. It’s important for me that they are raised centered in Christ. So I need to put effort into making sure that they are in church every time the doors are open and that they see their parents living out God first lives. Goal three is broken up into little mini goals all day long. Being a good mom is very important to me! As I watch my daughters growing up, I can see my progress, and I am truly happy. I know I will continue to put effort in the direction of being a good mom, because I love them with all of my heart and they mean the world to me.

Once you have your goals, it’s important to break them up into obtainable smaller goals, these become your next steps forward!

#4: ALONG WITH YOUR WHAT, YOU’LL NEED A WHY

The why keeps you motivated.

I know the five goals above may seem big overall, but by breaking them down, they do seem obtainable to me. I know why they are important to me, and I have a deep passion to achieve them. I know why I place God front and center. I know why I love my husband and want a strong and happy marriage. I know why my girls mean the world to me and why being a good mom is so important to me. I know God laid it on my heart to write, and He is calling me forward to serve Him, and that is why I have a goal to let His light shine. I believe in Him and I have faith in Him. I know that in order to accomplish all of this, I have to take care of myself and my health, and that is why I’ve made it a goal to be healthy.

Why are you going to put effort in the right direction?

If you don’t know your why, I can promise you will lose your focus. Because here is the ugly truth. Achieving goals, making progress, living a happy life isn’t always sunshine, rainbows, and unicorns. SOMETIMES IT’S HARD. Like that fight I had with my 13-year-old daughter last week hard. Or like mile 3 in my 3 mile run in 90 degree weather hard. It’s like the overwhelmed, I want to quite, I can’t do this anymore, moment I had with goal four last month.

You’ll need to remember your why, when the enemy comes to destroy your marriage. You’ll need to remember your why when the enemy comes to steal your children. You’ll need to remember your why when the enemy comes to kill your dreams.

The ugly truth is that as soon as we set goals, to move towards progress the enemy will want to defeat us. He does not want us to be happy.

He knows exactly what to do and he’s sneaky in his attacks. He knows our weakness, our doubts, and our fears. He will use them against us to deter our progress and steal our happiness. He delights in our confusion, our tiredness, and our weakness. He celebrates when we give up and when we abandon our goals.

To keep the enemy at bay you’ll need to remember that life is a marathon and not a sprint. Start strong, keep focused, and work to move forward at a steady pace. Our lives change often, meeting with God on a regular basis to make sure that our goals still align with His plans for our lives is so important. Goals change, and that’s okay. But having God’s grace in your life is so important, make sure you’re involving Him in your life every day.

Keep your eyes on your own life, do not become a victim of the comparison trap.

This is the enemy’s favorite tactic to get you off course. Comparing your life to others, and coveting what you may not have will only bring you down. God has a plan for each and every one of us. Live out your own life, don’t walk in the shadows of someone else’s!

Stop letting other people’s opinions decide your WHAT, WHY, & EFFORT. These are your goals. These are your next steps forward. Just be you and do you. Trust me, you’ll find so much happiness in living your life with what matters most to you as your main focus.

Do not tear yourself apart and quite because of failure and set backs.

Speak positively about yourself always. When you hear those mean thoughts about yourself in your mind, recognize that the enemy is attacking you. GOD loves you. He already sees your mistakes before they happen, and He forgives all. BUT the enemy will use your past mistakes and failures to defeat you. Be on guard always. All people make mistakes, all people experience set backs, the important part is that if you’ve decided it’s important to you, then don’t give up. Shake it off, and dig deeper.

If you’re questioning your progress in life, or just need to re-focus, then grab a cup of sweat tea and settle down in a comfy spot for just a bit, it’s time for a self-evaluation.

Do you have it all together? I challenge you to do the same anyway, you might discover something new!

Ask yourself:

What is most important to me in my life?

Establish your goals, and start determining how you will start applying effort in the right direction to meet them.

Why are your goals important to you?

WHAT+ GOALS+EFFORT IN THE RIGHT DIRECTION+WHY=PROGRESS & HAPPINESS

Tuck this piece of paper away in a very special place, and every time you start to feel like you’re not making progress, look back at your what. Every time you feel confused about your next steps forward, look back at your effort in the right direction. Every time you wonder if it’s really worth all your effort, or you start to feel defeated and you want to give up, look back at your why.

Here’s a piece of my heart just for you. God told me on that little pink yoga mat as I sat crisscross apple sauce that I already knew my answers. He tugged at my heart the way only God can. Because in that moment He reminded me of all the effort I had spent going in the wrong direction in my past.

When my career topped the list of most important things in my life, and God wasn’t on it. He reminded me of all the long days I had spent working my butt off, while my children stayed at daycare, and I came home too tired to play. When I spent more time making other people happy, than being a good wife or a good mom. I missed the first two years of Emily’s life, just trying to “make it” at something the doesn’t even matter to me anymore.

He reminded me of the horrible 7th year my marriage suffered, because I had forgotten to place an importance on it, and I had taken my husband for granted. God reminded me in those moments how far I had come in the past several years. He reminded me that He saved me, and that because I chose to place Him front and center in my life, He had already begun to realign my priorities, without me even realizing it.

My darling friend you are capable of progress in every goal you’ve set! If your WHAT and WHY glorify God, then know that He is walking right beside you. Our goals may not look anything alike, or maybe they will look exactly the same. The important thing is that we all feel like we are making progress. My prayer for you would be that you live out a life full of happiness.

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